In my thirty-three years on this planet, I've come to the conclusion that there are two types of people--those that are only capable of seeing things in black and white and those that see all the different shades of grey. There's nothing quite like spending a little time with someone who only sees black and white to make you appreciate the ability to see more than that. I've found that most things of beauty and pleasure reside somewhere inside the grey.
Not every question has a yes or no answer. Not every argument has a right side and a wrong side. Not every fight has a good and an evil. I believe the truth usually lies somewhere in the middle. Somewhere in the grey. (Maybe that's why I always did better on essay questions than true/false questions in school.) That's not to say that there aren't some unquestionable black and white issues for people, myself included. But the older I get, the more grey appears in my view of the world.
A guy I used to know once told me that everything under the sun was black and white. He said that the people who saw a bunch of grey in the world were really just incapable of making a decision and sticking to it. Well, that statement bothered me--and not just because it's a common trait seen in sociopaths, although that did immediately pop into my mind. But really it made me sad because it made me realize that there are probably a lot of people out there with the same notion of decisiveness. Being so rigid in your views is not a good thing. It forces you do away with basic human emotions like empathy and compassion. If everything must fall into a category of right or wrong, good or evil, then that applies to people as well. And people are nothing if not falliable. If you belong to the all black and white camp though, just trying to be a good person is not enough. And that's too much pressure for a human being. There has to be some leeway for putting forth the effort even if you fall short in the end.
However, the world opens up to all sorts of beauty if you allow yourself to see and experience the grey. Anytime a person backs themselves into a box of black and white they are limiting the experiences they will have in this world, or at least the enjoyment of those experiences. So, I try not to impose random limitations on myself. I have my basic core beliefs and a desire to be a good person, but aside from that, I try to keep myself open to new things. And I think in most circumstances it's not what you do that ultimately matters, it's the reason you do it and the intentions you had at the time.
At the end of the day, I believe the most fullfilling life only comes when you learn to embrace the grey.
Not every question has a yes or no answer. Not every argument has a right side and a wrong side. Not every fight has a good and an evil. I believe the truth usually lies somewhere in the middle. Somewhere in the grey. (Maybe that's why I always did better on essay questions than true/false questions in school.) That's not to say that there aren't some unquestionable black and white issues for people, myself included. But the older I get, the more grey appears in my view of the world.
A guy I used to know once told me that everything under the sun was black and white. He said that the people who saw a bunch of grey in the world were really just incapable of making a decision and sticking to it. Well, that statement bothered me--and not just because it's a common trait seen in sociopaths, although that did immediately pop into my mind. But really it made me sad because it made me realize that there are probably a lot of people out there with the same notion of decisiveness. Being so rigid in your views is not a good thing. It forces you do away with basic human emotions like empathy and compassion. If everything must fall into a category of right or wrong, good or evil, then that applies to people as well. And people are nothing if not falliable. If you belong to the all black and white camp though, just trying to be a good person is not enough. And that's too much pressure for a human being. There has to be some leeway for putting forth the effort even if you fall short in the end.
However, the world opens up to all sorts of beauty if you allow yourself to see and experience the grey. Anytime a person backs themselves into a box of black and white they are limiting the experiences they will have in this world, or at least the enjoyment of those experiences. So, I try not to impose random limitations on myself. I have my basic core beliefs and a desire to be a good person, but aside from that, I try to keep myself open to new things. And I think in most circumstances it's not what you do that ultimately matters, it's the reason you do it and the intentions you had at the time.
At the end of the day, I believe the most fullfilling life only comes when you learn to embrace the grey.
1 comments:
It's so true - people who only see black and white are no fun at all. In fact, being around them can often be a physically painful experience.
Simple explanations are eternally popular because they relieve us of the responsibility to do the hard work of thinking for ourselves. Unfortunately, human history is strewn with horrific examples of what can happen when we abdicate that responsibility.
The flipside, however, is that the company of those who can see the greys tends to be quite enjoyable. :-)
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